Sometimes the kid catches me off guard. He is really smart and he is really funny. In some respects, he is very much like his granddad. I know what you’re thinking. You’re thinking: “I need to scratch the smart in reference to Granddad”. At least, most people will agree that I’ve got a quick sense of humor. Trust me, so does Jake.


The other day, I noticed my red jeans were hanging on the doorknob of my closet door. They had been taken out of my closet on their hanger and relocated for obvious visibility. Strange don’t you think?  Jake is the one that thought the red jeans were strange. Actually, I purchased the red jeans from Dillard’s (Ralph Lauren brand) a couple of years ago. I caught them at the end of the summer sale two year’s ago in August.


Jake will do anything for a laugh. You’ve heard the expression: “Little eyes have big ears.” It is certainly true of Jake. He doesn’t miss a beat. A couple of years ago, I dressed wearing the jeans. Actually, it was the first time I’d worn them and by coincidence, Craig and crew were here for a visit. “No, no, no… you’re not going to go anyway dressed like that” was Craig’s immediate response. He made some reference to the color of the jeans that he mistakenly referenced as pink.


I had no doubt that it was Jake that had relocated the jeans from the clothes rod to the doorknob of my closet. I smiled with the thought: “That kid!” I opted not to mention it, but wasn’t the least bit surprised when he brought the topic up in conversation. He asked: “Granddad – Have your worn your pink jeans lately?” He was expecting a rise out of me. He was smiling ear-to-ear.


I think I called him “knucklehead” and said: “Thanks to you and your dad, I have not worn those jeans. However, my jeans aren’t pink, they are red.” I went on to add, “Pink is a good color, but only secure men wear pink”. He gave me one of those “Granddad – You are really strange looks.”


Like I said, “Jake will do anything for a laugh.” He is really a funny kid. Actually, he is better at humor than I am and I think I can hold my own with the best of them. However, there are times the kid really catches me off guard.


Jake had to go home yesterday in order to be ready for a scheduled weekend church camp that begins today. Consequently, I offered to meet his mother in Bastrop. That is only about an hour or so away. That would make it an easy commute for us and for his mom.


Like I said, “Sometimes the kid catches me off guard.” I had no doubt that he’d want me to drive the convertible. Actually, I was looking forward to the experience. Regardless, I asked: “Do you want to go in the convertible or the truck?” I figure it never hurts to give kids a choice. “This or that” works in lots of venues with kids. Actually, it works in lots of venues with adults as well. People like to have a choice. That’s true of little people as well as big people. It underscores the recognition that they have a voice in the decision making process.


It kind of let the air out of my sails when Jake didn’t immediately jump at the chance to ride in the convertible. Instead of choosing the convertible, he threw out a different potential option than either of the two I mentioned. He replied: “I want to go in Gram’s car.” Wow! I didn’t see that coming.


Gram was in earshot when Jake expressed his desire that we take her car. She assured him that wasn’t going to happen. Reportedly, she needed her car to run some errands and she didn’t want to drive my truck. In addition, she doesn’t know how to drive the Miata.


Okay, so by default, we opted to drive the truck. It would have been a little selfish of me to insist that we take the Miata. Besides that, when Jake explained why he didn’t want to ride in the convertible, it made sense to me. He said: “I want to sleep”. I can’t sleep in the convertible.”


Jake also can’t sleep and talk. Did I mention, he talked nonstop all the way? Of course, he like the General, talked a little to softly for me to hear. Consequently, I asked him to turn up the volume several times in the midst of our conversation. Unlike the General, he didn’t seem to mind repeating what he had said and doing it in a louder voice.


Of course, Jake knows the rules of the road when it comes to riding in my truck. Actually, the same is true of the Miata. Rule One: “No food inside the car!” Consequently, I was a little surprised by the request he articulated loudly enough the first time for me to hear. He said: “I’m hungry”! Would you stop and get me a bag of Cheetos?


First of all, we weren’t getting anything to eat inside the truck. Secondly, even if we were, “Can you imagine the residue of leftover Cheetos on the cloth interior in my truck?” It wasn’t going to happen.


Like I said, “Little eyes have big ears.” The last time the General and I went to Craig’s, we got into a little conflict over the fact that I have the same road rules for the General that I have for the kids. “No food inside the truck”. The General actually thought I was going to permit corndogs and tater tots inside my truck becasue we were rushed on time. It didn’t happen! I told Craig about the experience when we visited later that night. Jake doesn’t forget anything he overhears.


Okay, with Cheetos off the table, Jake wanted to know if he could eat a corndog in my truck? Smart kid!   He knows how to push the envelope. I countered by asking if he wanted a corndog when we got to Bastrop? He did and we did.


As a side note, Jake was really sick at his stomach by the time he and his mom got home. From the description, it sounds like repeated projectile vomiting. Bless his heart! I don’t think it has anything to do with the corndogs and tater tots. After all, a thoughtful Granddad wouldn’t let him eat alone.


Wow! Can you imagine the mess that could have made inside my truck? I’m breaking out in a cold sweat just thinking about what that experience would have been like.


All My Best!



One thought on “RULES”

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