I really didn’t think the General needed me to accompany her to her eye doctor’s appointment on Thursday morning. Of course, she had a different mindset. I’m not sure what she was expecting, but the doctor had referred to it as surgery, so she wanted to ensure she had a driver. Obviously, at some level she was terrified by the thought. Seriously, if my driving is as bad as she regularly indicates, the fact that she’d ride with me just to have me there for support is somewhat amusing.
Of course, I maintain that I’m a great driver with an impeccable driving record. I’ll even sign a release for you to check my driving record to substantiate that I’m telling the truth if you doubt the accuracy of my self-assessment. The fact that some people choose to bargain with God whenever they ride with me simply indicates that they’ve been misled by the denigrating references the General regularly makes concerning my driving. Whatever happened to the concept: “If you can’t say something nice, don’t say anything at all?”
I don’t know if you’ve ever thought about it, but isn’t it true that most people find what they are looking to find? If you begin your day with the perception that most of the people you’ll encounter in the course of a day will be pleasant and personable, you’ll probably have a delightful experience.
On the other-hand, if you anticipate that during the course of the day you’ll be dealing with Attila the Hun, it probably will prove to be anything other than a relaxing day. Of his reign, Atilla said of himself: “There, where I have passed, the grass will never grow gain.”
Personally, I’d much prefer to share time with someone like Johnny Appleseed than a powerful barbarian ruler that prided himself on being more effective than Roundup. You know the slogan: “Where There Is A Weed – There Is A Way”. The Roundup folks are pretty confident “Weeds. They’re low-down, stubborn little rascals. And we understand them like no other. So if you have a weed control problem, you can bet we have a weed control product for it. One that’ll get you back to kicking back and enjoying your great outdoors”.
Actually, last week the General thought she was going for the laser procedure. Her regular eye-doctor had made the referral. I was out of town so our daughter volunteered to be the chauffer to ensure her mother got home safely. Andrea is a sweet kid, but she said to me of the experience: “Dad – You owe me!”
Despite the perceived implication, she wasn’t making a critical comment concerning her mom. My owing her had to do with the length of time she and her mother were in the doctor’s office. From Andrea’s perspective the ordeal proved to be too much! Would you believe they were in the doctor’s office for two hours? There were several tests that needed to be run, but most of that time she and her mother were playing the waiting game in the doctor’s cozy and very crowded reception area.
I wouldn’t describe Andrea as having germaphobia, but she has some of the characteristics. She routinely steers clear of crowded waiting rooms. She’s certainly not going to pick up a magazine in a doctor’s office. After all, everyone who comes through the door has the potential to make a monthly magazine a lethal weapon. Okay, so maybe Andrea is a little more imaginative than the situation merits. However, I fully understand her disdain for the waiting game. I don’t’ like it either. I guess it is “like father-like daughter”. The waiting game certainly isn’t a pathway I want to travel.
The General’s appointment was scheduled for 10:45. We arrived before 10:30. The General checked in and was told by the receptionist that they weren’t expecting her. They didn’t have her on the schedule. She subsequently apologized to the General and said, “You were right. You were scheduled for this morning. Bear with us, we will work you in.”
It was about that time that I saw the sign. It read:
T I S
A G O O D
W E E K T O H A V E
A G O O D W E E K
Actually, I thought the sign was cleverly done. At least that was my first impression. As one hour turned into the next, I thought the signage represented false advertisement. It definitely represented false hope.
At 11:00 a.m. an older couple came in for their appointment. I say they were older, we probably were older than they were. I overheard the man at the reception desk saying: “We are early, but I thought I’d go ahead and fill out the paperwork for my wife”. I had the thought: “How bad is her vision?” Seriously, filling out doctor’s forms at the doctor’s office doesn’t fall into the category of spousal obligations. I breathed a sigh of relief. At least, I hadn’t been asked to do that? Actually, the General had filled out all of the forms the previous week.
The receptionist said to the man: “Your wife’s appointment isn’t until 2:00 o’clock. Why don’t the two of you go to lunch and come back? He declined and said: “It’s okay, we’ll just stay.” Are you kidding me? I’d have made a run toward the door.
Actually, I found myself feeling sorry for the man. It was only 11:00 a.m. and they were hanging around for a 2:00 appointment. I looked around the crowded waiting room. There were thirteen people waiting. By the time we left, the only folks waiting behind us were the man and his wife. The General’s procedure took ten minutes at most. When we left I had the thought: “It is a good week to have a good week. Don’t mess it up by spending three hours in a crowded germ infested waiting room. Okay, so I am my daughter’s father.
All My Best!