I generally don’t pay that much attention to the calendar. The days come and go in such rapid succession that it is like having to keep up with the swift movement of a cadence count. You know the drill: “One, two, three, four …sound off.” Whether voluntary or otherwise, most of us plod along to the rhetorical beat and quick time rhythm of life without fully processing the steps we take.
Somehow we manage to go the distance. For most of us that has never been the issue. Getting from point A to point B isn’t the problem. The problem is that we often don’t take advantage of simply enjoying the experience. We live our lives as though we are regimented to carve out seven minutes for a fast food lunch and we race throughout the day as though we are going to a fire.
For example, to prove my point, let me ask it this way: “What do you most remember about yesterday?” What treasured gift did you glean along the way that added contentment and fulfillment to your life?” Perhaps a better question than that is, “Whose life was touched by yours? Did the connection add quality and joy to both of your worlds?”
This isn’t rocket science. It is simple enough that all of us have the capacity to get it, but somehow we routinely miss it. Truth be told, that is one of the reasons I carve out the time daily to write something down. I don’t want to live life up without at least taking the time to notice where I’ve been and where I’m headed.
I’ve learned through the act of writing that it is better for me to dedicate a couple of hours a day to chronicling a memory or thought. That ensures that I devote some time thinking about the topic or experience. The time shared in giving it thought is of value to me.
Like I said, “I don’t pay a lot of attention to the calendar.” Consequently, the fact that I remembered the significance of today is almost unprecedented. Today, June 15th, is our 49th wedding anniversary. Where did the time go?
Day-before-yesterday, when we lived in the other house in Henly, Treva and I bought a grandfather clock to commemorate our 12th wedding anniversary. It doesn’t seem that long ago, but it was a lifetime ago. Andrea was one year old at the time. Today she is 36. How could that be possible? Of course, Craig was twelve and today he is 45. I won’t even begin to mention Treva’s age or mine. All I can say is that the grandfather clock has held up well.
For both of us, the grandfather clock is probably the one item most cherished by either of us in our home. There is something about the chiming of a clock that adds a flare of warmth and coziness to a home.
I’ve often said that I married way above my pay group. That is obvious to even the most casual of observers. Treva has it mostly all together and I’m mostly still a work in progress. Somehow, she hasn’t given up on me and she’s willing to go the distance.
Across the years, the things I valued and loved most about Treva when we were first married haven’t changed. She is still the same person I married a lifetime ago. And yet, it is also true that she isn’t at all the same person I married a lifetime ago. I like her better now than I did way back then.
In my arrogant stupidity, I will take credit for having taught her a lot. For one thing, during the first several years of our marriage, Treva hated to go shopping. Consequently, I purchased all of her clothing. You probably think I’m making this up, but it’s true. Do you remember Scarborough’s Department Store on Congress Ave and Sixth Street in downtown Austin? I shopped often for her at that location.
I don’t actually remember the year that the tide shifted, but trust me, the General no longer no has an aversion to shopping. She’s gotten it down to a fine art form.
If Treva were contributing to this posting, she’d probably tell you that she’s taught me a lot as well. She’d hasten to add that I am a very slow learner. We’ve learned from each other. Despite the distance we’ve come, we are still as different as night and day and yet, we’ve never been more alike. I just read those two sentences over twice. It sounds like a contradiction, but it is 100% factual.
It is almost uncanny; I know what she’s thinking before the words come out of her mouth. Even if I’m in the midst of doing what she wants me to do, she’s still going to verbalize the request. And yes, that makes me a little crazy.
She will tell you that my procrastination makes her a little crazy. I never miss a deadline, but I am also a fan of the last minute. That’s just the way I roll. She’ll never understand it, but if we agreed on everything, can you imagine how boring life would be?
At the end of the day, when push comes to shove, Treva is my greatest fan. She freely offers the gift of encouragement. She also mixes that with a lot of other advice, but I glean out the things that work for me and I don’t always pay attention or so she says.
Our life is good. It has worked well for the two of us and I am looking forward to going the distance. Since she doesn’t need me to shop for her clothing, I may pick up some ear plugs hunters use when hunting. That way I can enjoy the volume on my car radio while she muffles out the sound. If you believe that, I’ve got ocean front property for sale in Arizona.
It was Browning who said: “Come and grow old with me, the best is yet to be.” I’ll offer that same invitation to Treva except that I’m fairly resistive to the concept of getting old.
All My Best!